Despair, discouragement, depression – this is where David is at the
beginning of Psalm 13. I know,
because I have been there. My bible
study notes declare that David is suffering a physical illness from which he
expects to die (vs 3) leaving his enemies a reason to boast of winning the
battle. I find this ludicrous. It seems
our scholars do not realize the impact that physical exhaustion and mental
turmoil can have on our psyches.
The crazy
thing is that I fell into mental turmoil reading it:
How long must I wrestle with my
thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart…?
(vs 2)
Though I am
of little consequence compared to David, I also wrestled often with these
feelings of despair, discouragement and the paralyzing
effects of depression. By God’s Grace, I have found my way up and
out of the need to be paralyzed in
such a way because He has shown me how to jump back into His arms when the
cliff appears at my feet so that I no longer feel the need to jump in. The temptation arises, but He “enlightened my
eyes” (vs 3b) so that I can see the cliff and avoid falling or jumping over it
into the abyss.
As David
goes on with this conversation, God helps him to “transition” from despair, discouragement and depression
to trust and praise. This is a powerful
reminder that we can bring anything thing that troubles us to God; but we must
allow Him to turn our thoughts back to Him in Praise before we finish our talk.
We must make sure that we claim His promises and thank Him for what He will do
in answer to our prayer. Even if it is a
struggle, we must find our way back to the words He gives us about Himself and
who He is to us. David did that.
If my
periods of depression where that short… Well actually, they can be very short,
now, as long as I remember who He is and how much He loves me; I do not need to
go there because He will give me the strength not to, and He will catch me when
I jump back into His arms rather than over the cliff.
I will sing to the Lord for He has
been good to me.
(vs6)
Perhaps
this is why I sing so loud when I have the chance, rejoicing in the fact that I
can “trust (His) unfailing love, (and)
my heart rejoices in (His) salvation” (vs 5) I plead guilty to making a joyful “noise” unto
the Lord, and I hope those who might hear me will not be discouraged by what
they hear. I love my Lord and He loves
me. What else is there?
May all of
us who struggle with any of these weights on our hearts and in our minds, find
our way back in increasingly short periods of heavy hearts, and begin to
realize how much God can accomplish in our lives regardless of our
circumstances. We are His Beloved and He
is our lover, our protector and our refuge in time of any trouble, even mental and heart issue trouble.
May we begin to realize that we are not wrong
to find ourselves on the edge of despair; we are only wrong to stay there, not
asking and not accepting God’s Grace to pull us back out of our errors in thinking. May we end every bout of doubt with reminders
from His words that He is always with us in His unfailing love. We are blessed beyond our understanding. May we recognize this and praise Him daily
for all that He is and does and will do in us and through us. Amen.
And Lord,
may this disaster in the Philippines
be used by you to bring richness into the hearts of those who love and trust
you and may it also bring many to realize that they have prayed to someone in
their fear and that the only one listening was You. Break hearts for your heavenly glory through
this earthly terrible disaster. In Jesus name, Amen.
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